Creation, Men and Women

by Miriam Metzinger | More from this Blogger

05 Feb 2007 10:02 PM

In a sense, every marriage, since it is comprised of a man and a woman, is a "mixed marriage." The fact that men and women are opposites makes the relationship, by nature, stormy, which adds a sense of danger or excitement. It is often said that G-d brought men and women together to complement each other, not only to "make up for" each other's deficiencies, but to refine each other's character traits. Men and women may find that, after a certain period of time together, they may feel that they are two halves of a whole. This isn't a development, but is in fact, the way they were created. According to Jewish mysticism, a marriage is the joining of two halves of the neshama into one.Before Creation, the souls of married couples were joined, and when G-d created Man and Woman, he split the souls in half. The process of finding a mate really entails searching for the other half of one's soul, or one's bashert.

Rabbi Manis Friedman of Minnesota described the secret fears of men and women, which explains something about their natures. A man's greatest fear is that he is nothing. Any insult, slight or setback subtly reminds him of the fact that he was created from dust. However, a woman's secret fear is that she is nothing but him. This fear is based on the fact that Chava (Eve) was created from Adam's rib, and a woman is concerned about becoming a independent person and not just a pedestal to support to man in her life.

Rabbi Friedman also describes the difference between a woman becoming lost in the man in her life, which he says is a terrible occurence, and when a woman becomes completely dedicated to her husband and family because they are hers. If a woman is immersed in her family they way an inventor is obsessed with a project, this is a postive use of her abilities.

Learn more about Miriam Metzinger

Miriam is a freelance writer, a work-at-home mom and lives in Jerusalem with her two sons, Schneur Zalman (3), Yosef Yitzchak (6 months and counting) and her husband, Yehoshua, who is a rabbi and i...

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