Does Becoming Orthodox Mean Giving Everything Up?

by Miriam Metzinger | More from this Blogger

20 Aug 2008 07:54 PM

The other day, I saw a letter published on the internet to Rabbi Tzvi Freeman. The writer was concerned about a friend of his who was once a successful musician, but who had given everything up when he became religious. The friend was learning in Yeshiva (an academy where Torah is learned intensively) day and night and didn't have time for his music, much less, to spend time with his friends. When the concerned man asked his friend if he spent any time composing and playing, the newly-religious friend said he had "lost his musical soul and gained another one," and wasn't interested in music anymore.

Now, just to evaluate one of the man's statements; a Jew who becomes religious does not gain a new soul. Judaism says a convert gains a new soul, but a Jew is born with a Jewish soul whether he or she is religious or not. When a Jew becomes religious, the soul's potential is revealed. So this man was speaking, I think, metaphorically when he said he had a new soul.

Second, anyone who has ever heard of Matisyahu knows that one does not have to give up music and art to become an Orthodox, even a Chassidic, Jew. Matisyahu, born with the name Matthew Miller, was not born Orthodox but became religious in his twenties. He transformed his secular music skills so they would convey Torah messages. I learned when I became religious, that the talents and skills we have are G-d given, and it is better to transform them for Torah uses rather than throw them away.

However, Rabbi Freeman did not tell the man to preach this sermon to his friend. He predicted the newly-religious friend would soon realize this and he was going through a phase of believing he had "given up" his music, when he probably just needs a break to figure out how is life is developing before he continues on his creative path. This is exactly what happened to me. I was a playwright before I became religious. I knew I wanted to continue to write creatively when I became inspired to live a Torah life (I don't write plays anymore, but I could if I wanted to) but I needed some time off to absorb the changes before I could write anything. My family panicked that I was "throwing away my talent" but I told them to just be patient and with Hashem's help, I am now making my living writing (something I wasn't able to do before) and am publishing articles regularly.

So if any of you know someone who is becoming Orthodox and seems to be giving everything up, I would voice Rabbi Freeman's advice and say it is best not to worry. It takes all of us time to sort things out during a period of adjustment.

Learn more about Miriam Metzinger

Miriam is a freelance writer, a work-at-home mom and lives in Jerusalem with her two sons, Schneur Zalman (3), Yosef Yitzchak (6 months and counting) and her husband, Yehoshua, who is a rabbi and i...

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